Monday, 13 May 2013

Little Insights

It is rare for a wife to come home from a weekend away and be delighted when her husband tells her she "definitely looks bigger."

I quite like one of his new nicknames for me; 'Bumpy'.

I'm less keen on 'Chunk'.

In fact, if he continue to choose to use the latter then thank fuck we have two more embryos in the freezer because the lack of testicles that will result will mean these are the only two options for Doug to have a sibling.

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A guy at work got a free stamp with a craft magazine he advertises with. He offered it to me to stamp on the baby when she is born.

I told him if there was one thing this baby could not claim to be it was "Homemade".

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I was emailing a bloke at work who is relatively new and doesn't therefore know about my six weeks off in 2011 for IVF.

I'm practicing my best street slang. As one does when conversing wit da yoot.

He writes that I'm gonna be one cool mother.

I respond that it is a worry I can't read that without thinking he's calling me a motherfucker.

To which he says it is that action that got me into this state.

I paused, deciding eventually that this random guy didn't need to know that this baby wasn't conceived in the normal way.

See, I do have some kind of self control.

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I've added a new word to my vocabulary.

I'm off on a wee trip this week. I thought it was a citybreak.

Three separate people have informed me it is a Babymoon.





4 comments:

  1. I will never understand that whole "babymoon" phrase and here's why.

    When you get married; the honeymoon is after the wedding.

    Why is a babymoon before the baby?? Shouldn't it be AFTER the baby like a honeymoon??

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  2. Enjoy your vacation! Cutesy descriptions of anything annoy me. Precision in language should be encouraged...and if you must try to be funny, it should involve a particularly egregious pun.

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  3. We were given a load of handmedowns including a grobag (don't worry, you'll know what one is soon) which said Home Grown. Now we got it from friends whose baby was conceived via ICSI (though I think it was a hand me down to them), they could probably just about get away with the "grown" part but we certainly couldn't!

    But anyway the baby labelling police have not got us yet!

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I've resisted word verification for ages but I'm getting so many spam comments at the moment that I think it is time. Sorry!