Sunday, 11 November 2012

The Results Show!

When I asked how many embryos I should put back last post, I genuinely couldn't decide what the right course of action would be. I didn't know which way you'd vote and if I had to guess, I expected a 50/50 split between putting one back or putting two and I'd be no closer to making a decision - I'd chalk it up to an interesting experiment in blogging, but pay no more attention to the results than those people who ask you to arbitrate on an argument between them and their partner when all they really want to hear is "you were right."

I couldn't have been more wrong.

Of the 31 comments (plus two emails) I got, the split was (and don't go back and check because lots of you added caveats to your answers but I went with the response I felt you were leaning towards):
One back = 23
Two back = 4
"Up to you" / pros and cons of both / sitting elegantly on the fence = 6

However it wasn't just the overwhelming numbers of ones verses twos that had me convinced. It was the fact that you had rational reasons behind your choices.

Some highlights:
Brave IVF Girl: "There are immune-related cases where one bad embryo can ruin the environment for a good embryo."

Guinevere: "Sometimes miscarrying one causes the other to be lost too."

Nic: "I always wished that I had only thawed one and put that one in. That way, if the one didn't survive the thaw they would be able to thaw another one."

Rainy City Girl: "I would do one at a time ... as the ladies pointed out, the uterine environment changes every cycle and who knows when it is ideal."

Jessica Milln: "The natural order is to have one baby at a time - unless you are a sheep."

(In case you are wondering, I can categorically confirm that I am not a sheep.

Baa.

Oops.)

Pundelina: "I'd suggest you only do one at a time, maximise your chances and the health of baby-to-come. Single Embryo Transfer as it's safer for both mother and babies ... and costs the healthcare system far less."

A few of you asked about embryo quality. Oddly enough I don't really know what the quality is. All three got to blastocyst so that is good. Also, I am getting rather blase about embryo quality. I've read of so many people having a straggling, poorly-graded bunch of cells put back in and nine months later a beautiful baby (or two) - see T's response:

"The only reason I put back two last year was because they were not brilliant quality, so I figured their chances were better fresh than frozen, and anyway I was convinced in would not work. The power of negative thinking ..."

I could have quoted any of you. You all made valid points - even those of you that went against the grain and plumped for two.

Thank you.

But of course my top comment was from Anonymous: "You're my IVF hero so I've no doubt you'll make the right decision for you."


What?! It isn't all about good advice, this blog's other purpose is to serve as a conduit for an ego massage for me.









12 comments:

  1. Hooray, a new post from you! :) I found your blog a few months ago and have read back from the beginning in the meantime (and therefore most of Nuts in May's now too), but have never commented before.

    I don't really know what the point of this comment was other than to point out that I'm glad when I have something to read from you, and please don't think that just because your journey is a little...stalled? right now, that people aren't reading/interested. :)
    N.

    How's the house? The agonies? The progesterone? The aunt-dom? You are more than just an infertility journey/story (although as an infertile also, that is how I found your blog) and you doubtless have more lurkers and readers who would like to hear more from you :)

    And other waffley ramble.

    *blush*

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    1. P.s. I also was surprised by how many said SET - and also now feel better about the fact that they'll only put one back in me, on the Nhs, due to my age

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  2. Well, you know, the infertility community is very smart...

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  3. I thought one was a better option too - but thought I'd wait to talk to you in person! Looking fwd to Friday catch-up. x

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  4. Going with the theme of Do as I say not as I do- we did put 2(out of 3) back in last Thursday. One of my embryos did not make it. Now, I am freaking out and wondering if I should have done one at a time so as to give the other one a better chance. Well the two week wait gives me hell anyway. Good luck!! I am so rooting for you.

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  5. oooh, I got quoted, does that mean I'm famous? What have you decided anyway?
    :)

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  6. I love your blog. I also found you about a month ago. You're a brilliant writer. It give me some real perspective as I'm starting my own "infertile" journey. Hope all goes well with this round whether its one or two back in.

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  7. Ha..I was reading that thinking my absence meant you were non-plussed by my response and then, there I am right at the bottom!
    Thank-you.
    I have another problem for you Auntie Womby, this time it’s mine, I don't know if you've ever had this particular slap in the face but yesterday my consultant (CRGH) told me to use donor sperm...we've had 2 failed IUIs and 2 failed IVF/ICSIs. No problems identified with either of us, just our embryos fail day 4 onwards ...he said they can't tell whether it’s an egg or sperm problem...we're going to get a second opinion next, but do you have any advice for me - test/treatments or where to get that golden second opinion from in London/UK? You'll still be my hero either way. Fingers-crossed for your cycle ;)

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    Replies
    1. Hey anon, We need to talk by email (I try not to name specific clinics here - you know just in case I get sued!). Drop me a line womb4improvement@gmail.com

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  8. Sounds like our corner of the internet is very wise. Sounds, as well, like you're making the right decision. And on the quality front...I agree wholeheartedly.

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  9. Sage advice indeed, but as you and your wombmate can attest, "sheep happens" sometimes!

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I've resisted word verification for ages but I'm getting so many spam comments at the moment that I think it is time. Sorry!