Thursday, 23 June 2011

Just What The Doctor Ordered

So when you last left our intrepid hero (that'd be me, btw) I was at the doctors and had gone through the tests I thought should be performed - and was mostly rebuffed - now we rejoin the appointment to hear what the Doctor had to say:

The first thing he wants to do is another womb biopsy.

The most difficult thing about the appointment was hearing his assessment of my condition. It is serious, it is really serious.

In fact, the language he used was pretty sobering. (Not that I was drunk, you understand, as a rule I tend to avoid alcohol before Doctors appointments).

He said, and I quote:
"Someone up there is smiling on you."

This might seem a bizarre thing to say to someone cursed with infertility. However, he went on to explain; my first womb biopsy was terrible. He thinks I have had a very narrow escape from womb cancer. He was appalled at the amount of time it took from the first investigations to referral to a specialist (him) and a diagnosis.

He didn't mince his words. I will have to have a hysterectomy. After I have finished with fertility treatments, but pregnancy isn't the solution. The solution is full on removal. (Womboval? Does that work? No? As you were then).

For the rest of my life, until I have the hysterectomy I will either be having fertility treatment or be on the pill.

I had vague yearnings to try again naturally.  I'd read about some alternative therapies with dramatic results.

No chance.

Not just the Doctor, but the husband made that clear. Turns out the husband can't be bothered to go through the whole courting process again to find a new wife, so he is insistent that I don't do anything that might risk my health.  Either that, or he is worried alternative therapies might force him to drink ground up tiger penis, or worse have his taint pricked.

I sort of knew all this before, despite hoping that it might just go away. But the language the Doctor used, and his seriousness scared me. And was hard to hear.

So I get another womb biopsy - funded by the NHS as this is an ongoing, serious, medical condition.

Moving onto what he'd do differently next IVF. He said that next time - as well as giving me intralipids - he'd change my drug protocol.

The next IVF protocol will be Antagonist. Which is what the wombmate had. No I don't really get why either. He did explain, something to do with not wanting me to take Buserlein for the good of my womb-lining.

However, it will increase my risk of Ovarian Hyperstimulation Syndrome.

Meh, you win some, you lose some.

The next thing he said, however, got me very excited. He gave me a glimmer of hope that I might be able to get another round of IVF on the NHS. Unfortunately, a bit more research, has proved that not to be the case.

I shall therefore be spending this IVF-hiatus ferreting down the back of sofas for loose change as I try to amass the £7,000 needed for the next cycle.


  1. Wow - you are a strong and brace woman for taking all of this on... and with humor to boot! Hoping that this IVF cycle works for you and that you can safely become the mother you want to be while maintaining your health.

  2. Oh, Liz. What a chin-smack of an appointment. I'm so sorry, lovey; there was a lot of hard stuff for you to chew there.

    Not that it applies to you, as you responded so beautifully, but the antagonist cycle suited me fine, I barely noticed I was on it. Mind you, I DID get OHSS...

  3. Why is it that even when you are writing about something so sober I am still sitting here cracking up? You have a way with words, Liz! I hope these changes are what it takes to make you a mama.

  4. I can't really decided what to say...I want to say thanks for making me laugh, but with the subject matter, I feel bad saying that...I hope this time off goes by super quick and you can get on with the baby making attempts!

    Keeping you in my thoughts!

  5. I am sorry to hear this.
    I too am looking at a hysterectomy after (if) I have kids and am wondering where the heck I will get £7000 for another IVF round if my FET does not work.
    Great you get another biopsy on the NHS though. Hope it brings better news than expected

  6. Oh, no, Liz. I now realise I was doing a bit of the la la las, it's gone away, type thing. But no. I am very sorry. Can we help with the dosh? If you had an ad on here, I'd click it every day. You better believe it. ;)

  7. Damn.

    I know it was on the table. Or, perhaps it's more accurate to say: hanging over you. But his words do sound very sobering indeed. Having the rug of giving-it-another-try-natural-style yanked out is also very rough. I'm glad they're going to try another protocol - sometimes small tweaks make a big difference. And if there was any chance of the Buserelin affecting the lining, it makes sense to stay well away.

    Hoping that 7k leaps out of those sofa cushions at you.

  8. Knew it was there, but I really hoped it had gone away. Sorry, that sounds like a really difficult appointment.
    Hoping for you x

  9. Ugh. I can see why you needed more than one post to cover this appointment. What a terribly unpleasant truth to face. Glad to hear that your husband is going to make sure you don't suddenly decide you're invincible.

    So, antagonist protocols and loads of money. Much luck...

    How is the wombmate doing, anyway?

  10. I thought I saw on the antagonist protocol to reduce the likelihood of OHSS. Very confused.
    Womb mate

  11. Womb for removal... as a blogname it has a certain ring to it, but as a prospect? It sounds so wrong, so can't be happening. Is there any chance that the biopsy will not be the never ending saga this time around? Is it reason to panic? or for reassurance only? I hope that the time and money thing will find a way of working together and itself out.

  12. Man, that just kind of sucks. I'm sorry.

  13. So sorry to hear of your latest news...but it sounds like you are keeping the optimism. Any chance you would be willing to share the information you found on promising alternative therapies you mentioned? Will keep you in my thoughts and send good vibes your way for a successful next round!

  14. ...HELL. This has got to be a really rough thing to face, and my heart goes out to you. I really wish it HAD just gone away. All I can say is: you'd better get a couple of babies out of this next IVF, or I'll be quite angry. And while I'm making my demands, I'll throw in a couple of babies for the wombmate, too. (In her uterus, of course--I won't ask you to do all the work.)

  15. How awful that you have the double shittiness of infertility AND a serious medical issue on top of that. That is some sobering news indeed. I just hope the private route can move things along for you a little faster.

  16. Cripes - it sounds like your infertility (which caused all the delving into your womb) may have potentially saved your life - there's one hellova big silver lining (pardon the pun) to the yuckiness of being barren.

    Is there much involved with a womb biopsy? Do you have to go under anaesthetic? Hope it's not too painful or involved...

    I guess the sooner you get that sorted, the sooner you can get on with trying again so I hope things get moving for you quickly - keep us posted.

  17. oh, crikey, I don't want to be flippant here but am so hoping it is third time lucky for you. I hope things move quickly for you.
    I spoke to a good friend the other night who is trying to move on from unsuccessful fertility treatment and is struggling so much, I think your next post on how tough you are finding it will be appreciated by many but do keep finding the humour, cos as you say, if you didn't laugh you'd cry.


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