Tuesday, 17 May 2011

Going Belly Up

Last night I suddenly noticed just how swollen my stomach looked. Distended to the point of starvation victim (or five months pregnant).

It was a bit disconcerting not just because of its enormous size but it was hard - like a basketball (I'm guessing here, I only ever played netball but always thinking of the foreigners who read this blog I like to use references you Yanks understand!). I poked and prodded it a bit, and showed the husband.

He was more concerned than me - the Doctor cautioned last time that swelling might be a symptom of Ovarian hyperstimulation syndrome, this he remembered - so he made me promise to ask the nurse about it when I went in to hospital today. I did, and other than a nonchalant shrug and asking me whether I was drinking plenty of liquids (I am, I'm drinking water like it is gin and I'm my Grandmother), she wasn't bothered.

However, last night the husband was unaware that the nurse would be so unconcerned, so he googled it. How can I properly emphasise the momentosity (momentality? momentousness?) of this action?

I'm going to have to repeat it.


My husband googled an IVF symptom.

My. HusBand. Goo. Gled. An. I. V. F. symp. tom.

In many ways I consider us an atypical couple in terms of our roles in the home. He does the majority of the cooking, buys the most shoes and spend more on clothes than me.

I have DIY responsibilities.

But there is one role that is mine, and mine alone. I am the one that googles the shit out of infertility - endlessly. He waits for me to explain things in words of no more than two syllables and listens to what the doctor tells him.

But last night the husband went on to use words I never thought I would hear him say, "I read
on this IVF message board..."

Once the smelling salts had bought me round, he continued:

"... that quite a few women say they got more bloated on their second IVF than their first."

IVF-ers out there - was this the case for you?

A little post-script:

At one point last night when I thought the husband was safely in the next room watching telly I was sitting on the bed minding my own business just idly resting my hand on my tummy. He came into the room, "You secretly quite like it don't you? You're pretending your pregnant" he accused.

Ladies, I am afraid I was, and I can confirm without a shadow of a doubt that if I do get pregnant I will totally turn into that woman.

I will be a stomach-stroker.


  1. My husband googled infertility and came up with clomid. That necessitated an hour of explaining why IVF was a better option for us. I sometimes wish he wouldn't google things.

    Large bellies make convenient armrests. Why wouldn't you take advantage?

  2. first comment, woot! (don't know why that got me excited)
    I LOVED my tummy while I was pregnant (the only time, ever, since skinny ocllege days). I fondled it constantly. Just couldn't stop playing with it. ;)
    I hope you find out there's not OHSS and all is well! I'm so excited for y'all!

  3. noooo! areyoukidding me beat me! are you kidding me?!

  4. "I'm drinking water like it is gin and I'm my Grandmother". Totally made my day.

    I was most definitely more bloated the second time around and ended up buying some elastic waisted pants. I took some pictures just to remember what the belly was like, but they are long since deleted. LOL.

  5. I'm still more scarred by where they were sticking needles into you yesterday than the husband's ability to use google. Seriously, I still can't believe it.....

    Our husbands sound scarily alike - I'm also completely responsible for DIY things (i.e. knowing where the screwdriver is - doesn't mean I know how to use it), whilst he does all the cooking and shopping for clothes / shoes. He usually has to force me into clothes / shoes shopping for myself. Mind you I don't think he ever googled anything IVF related in any of our 3 attempts..... then again, I never had a needle up the 'taint during the three cycles either...

  6. I too will be that woman. Hardcore. I pretty much already am. I did not noticeably with my second IVF than with my first. Then again, we got 13 eggs the first time and five the second. But since you asked...Hope all is going well.

  7. haha....the first time C told me he googled, look something up on a blog etc about IF I about fell out of my pants!! Or off the chair :)
    I don't know about the 2nd time around making you more or less bloated, bc I have almost triple the amount of follies this time than last, making me more bloated. I would say keep drinking and weigh yourself often....+5lbs call into the office. They told me that will be one of the first obvious symptoms. Hoping its just from lil follies growing like crazy in there!

  8. I hope you have quite a tummy to stroke soon!!! In the meantime, I hope that this nasty side effect goes down.

  9. It's ok sweets. You do whatever you want if that baby hangs in there! I loved loved loved showing my sweets that affection from the outside. I was just cautious around other women who may be hurt by it. But sometimes you have to scratch it or even hold it up a bit when it gets so heavy at the end.

  10. lmao@ iamstacey :D

    If I ever get to have a pregnant tummy, I'll only stroke it when I know I am alone as I know it would be hard for other IFers to witness. Aside from that, I already have a bit of a belly so it would probably gross people out to see me stroking it.

  11. ummm, is it not ok to be a stomach-stroker if I'm not pregnant? If my partner starts googling IF I'll probably stroke his stomach too.
    (if that makes me a nutcase I'll blame IF)

  12. It just makes me happy to hear that he thought enough to Google your symptoms. They really can surprise you can't they (still waters)? Good luck!!

  13. That's too sweet! I've had the same rush of love when my husband tells me about something IF related he's googled. Doesn't happen often, but it reminds me we're in this together.

    Hope all is deflating -- so it can reinflate for about 9 months!

  14. Sorry to hear that you have been so bloated. But you are hilarious and your writing is so funny. :) I wish for the best for your follicles! Man, I wish I had as many as you do. Keep us updated! When is your retrieval?

  15. That's awesome that he googled it! I'm pushing hubby to read a very short book about it. He, like yours, listens to what I tell him and the doc does, but that's it. Congrats! And kudos to him for calling you on it!

  16. I totally stroked my distended OHSS belly

  17. You described MY husband - cooking, shoes, clothes. I think they need to meet up and chat infertility over a few beers. Thank God we didn't have a computer when I was going through IVF because The Husband would have thought Dr. Google was real. However please do keep an eye on your belly. I had OHSS and it sucks. *New follower* Love your blog.

  18. Wow. A husband googling an infertility-related matter? I'm surprised the computer didn't spontaneously combust in shock. I've never caught my husband at this but, truth be told, I've suspected it a time or two. It's a bit odd for the male of the species to come out with something like "luteal phase support".

    And, yes, you will be a stroker. And it will be wonderful.

  19. You'll not only stroke that belly, you'll have a big happy grin on your face! I love that your hubby googled your symptoms :)


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