The coil has now been entrenched in the dark, moist, recesses of my hostile uterus for ten weeks. It was prescribed for three months and I am counting down the few days left until its eventual liberation*.
On the third of November, with none of the world's media watching, it will start its journey to freedom. Although the process will only take a few minutes for it will feel like much longer, as it makes its slow painful journey through the tight tunnel of my vagina. A space more use to a shaft going in than anything coming out.
It will emerge, bloodied, spent, but hopefully triumphant, after three months of non-stop work in frankly horrific conditions. Conditions that have to-date proven completely inhospitable to any form of life. A post-removal biopsy will confirm whether what it has done has been enough, whether it has chipped away at all the diseased womb-lining.
But whilst the coil has had to work in almost unbearable conditions it has not been completely abandoned. A oral progesterone team has been supporting the coil, conducting heroic rescue work on my womb from the outside. They started work the moment I was told that I needed to take progesterone for three months, the coil took a bit more kicking and screaming (on my part) before it was inserted.
Today the oral team have completed their twelve week stint. I have just taken my last pill.
Now we are in the downward slide towards the coil's removal. There is, quite literally light at the end of the tunnel.
Fingers crossed, the biopsy will be clear and I will be able to start IVF. Which will eventually give the husband and I an opportunity to raise our own minors. I might even rename my vagina 'camp hope' - or do you think that could be misconstrued?
With just two and half weeks to go until I can rid my womb of its unwanted inhabitant I am doing what any sensible person would do. I'm going on holiday today, for a week, a last opportunity to relax without intent before I have to really RELAX (because, as we all know, that is the only sure fire way to get pregnant). Allegedly.
But never fear you will not be totally abandoned. I have a very, very special guest post planned for Wednesday, from someone not usually given to bearing her soul in this way, so I urge you to read and lend a supportive comment - even if you normally only lurk here.
This is Womb For Improvement reporting from London, England and saying Goodbye (for a week or so).
*Regarding the Chilean miners (no, I don't know why they just sprung to mind either), you must read Adele's post on the topic.