Wednesday, 18 August 2010

Chances Are ...

Continuing on the mystic tip from Sunday's post.

I am currently on holiday a few miles from the picturesque Somerset town of Glastonbury. Glastonbury is known for two things; the largest outdoor music festival in Britain and new age hippy nonsense.

The festival was in June.

Glastonbury is a small town but has everything you need if you are of an alternatively spiritual bent. Aura painting, more crystals than Barbie's wedding dress, and a stock pile of incense to rival the Vatican. It appears that you cannot buy an item of clothing that is not hand woven from hemp by fairies - or as they are spelt in this part of the world faeries. Shops are overun with deities, Buddhas are plonked next to representations of Gaia, alien lizards nestle next to carvings of poly-armed eastern mystics. Runes are practically currency in this town.

It was only a matter of time before I decided to test the tarot.

I know, the things I do for blog-fodder.

"I sense a very strong male energy - three generations - your father, your ..." sly glance at the wedding ring, "husband and ... do you have a son?"


"Do you want children?"


"You will be pregnant with a son; I see that very strongly, soon ... um ... maybe in about four months possibly a bit longer."

So, considering that she didn't know I was due to have IVF in about four months that was an encouraging start.

Her subsequent revelations however had me less convinced:

"Your Dad is a typical 'Dad dad'..." Can't argue with that - he's the only dad I've known so I guess that'd make him pretty typical.

"Your Mum is very involved in your life." Er ... my Mum is dead, it'd be difficult to imagine her any less involved.

She countered quickly, "Ah, well, spiritually she is with you. She is very involved at a spirit level."

Nice recovery sweetheart.

Other nicely generic statements included. "You will move house at some point, to somewhere with more space." What? And I've just told you I want a family, maybe she is right, maybe now isn't the time to downsize.

She told me my job "wasn't the best job in the world, but neither was it the worst." I don't know what the best and worse jobs in the world are, but it would have been a bit of a conincidence if either holders of the aforementioned jobs came to get their cards read by her.

She was delighted to hear that I had a twin. (I had to tell her, she couldn't quite discern that by herself). She felt very keenly that we had a strong telepathic connection.

My twin sister and I have never had the slightest telepathic twinge. But she's the psychic, she'd know ...

Also, apparently in my future is a little girl. Good so she has covered both bases if I do ever get pregnant.

"There is a presence of an older woman in your life, your Grandmother."

Again, way off target with this one, both have been dead for many years. She said I had some very strong auras around me so it was hard sometimes to distinguish between those who had passed over and those who were still living.

mmm ... 'kay.

I didn't leave a convert to the Tarot. I mean it'd be nice if I got pregnant in four months and had a son. But considering 50% of couples under 35 who try to get pregnant manage it in 3 months, and roughly half of those have boys I'd say with her first prediction she is working the stats.

Let's just say I'm not about to go out, buy a purple crushed velvet cloak and start chanting at the moon.


  1. Nice to hear you're enjoying the West country, I grew up in that area so your post made me a little teary-eyed for 'home'. I'm living in Phoenix, AZ right now, but currently in Mexico doing another round of IVF to cook up some decent embryos.. 3 year journey so far, holy h### this shiz takes forever.
    I love your thoughts and how you articulate, makes me chuckle every time. Keep up the good work and the spirits, and those 4 months will whip by hopefully.

  2. I'd be too scared to go to a tarot lady, I think I'm not sceptic enough to take bad news with a grain of salt :)

    You becoming pregnant with a son in 4 months sounds promising!!

  3. Ha!

    Sounds like a fun waste of time, though.

  4. Being a contrary moo, I'd've revelled in letting her dig herself a Great Big Hole and then, only at the end, revealed all the things she'd got utterly off-base. Ha ha!

  5. Im dying... Although it is a complete and total hoax, I am glad you took part and shared it with us. Too funny!

  6. What a big pile of crap, it's just a shame so many people get sucked in. Enjoy Glastonbury though, I love that part of the world. Spent many evenings drinking local cider at a lovely little campsite at the bottom of the tor.

  7. Huh. Well, that's just sort of a mixture of intuition, observation and use of law of averages. *I* could do that!

    Let me present my new persona, Twangy Pearl, seer of .. stuff! I see .. things!

    (Got to work on the spiel a bit, that's all).

  8. Sounds like you had fun! I always wanted to go to one, just so that I could laugh. I am a complete sceptic I am afraid! I am heading down to cornwall in October, I love the west country

  9. Thank you for sharing that so brilliantly! Your post gave me a well-needed laugh this evening :-)

  10. she's so awesome! (NOT!).... I could never bring my self to go to them, but I guess the humor factor might make it worth it!

  11. I wish I had the audacity to demand my money back after a reading like that!

    And I thought all you British Islanders spelled it "faeries."

  12. LOL - when we were ttc I remember being told to sleep outside in teh moonlight for a few months. errr.... no thanks.

  13. I like to think that while she was working the stats on all her other observations, she was right on the money with the impending son. (But I did have a moment of deja vu reading this...does she practice auricular acupuncture in her spare time, perhaps?)

  14. Oh my, I don't think I could do that and stop myself from giggling!

  15. that was brilliant. these tarot readers, such a double edged sword -part of you just wants to believe what they're telling you so badly.


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