Sunday, 11 July 2010

A Broken Woman

Maintaining my virtuous pre-conception lifestyle is tough.

When I was having the three IUI's last year I was probably healthier than I have ever been. No alcohol, acupuncture on a twice weekly basis and the gym several times a week. When they failed I was utterly crushed and, with no physical reason to blame for my inability to conceive, I stopped being so strict. I allowed myself an occasional glass of wine or bottle of beer, rationalising it as a way to maintain some semblance of a normal life.

Over the past three and a half years I have given up booze and then started drinking again more often than Lindsay Lohan (although luckily my loss of willpower doesn't have quite such disastrous repercussions). Last night I fell off the wagon in spectacular fashion.

It was one of my oldest friends 40th birthday (and yes, I do mean oldest in the age sense). I hate it when people regale others with tales of their drunken shenanigans but suffice to say I didn't get to bed until five thirty in the morning and have spent the day utterly broken.

On the plus side though, as if the prospect of IVF in September wasn't enough to encourage me back to my abstemious ways, last night has strengthened my resolve to never drink alcohol ever, ever again (or at least until after the IVF).

I might even restart acupuncture and drag my increasingly flabby arse back to the gym. But one step at a time, eh?


15 comments:

  1. Heh! Oh, the good old morning after!

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  2. Morning after indeed.

    Rule no.1 - Never take any decisions made the day after a bender seriously.

    Hope the head is healing. In all honesty with the crap you've been through, a good blowout was much needed.

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  3. Incidentally, if you're still on FB I could show you my drunk-booking a couple of weeks ago. I drank on through til dawn alone with my laptop, and seemed to unwittingly live-blog some proper tripe. May & Shannon were obliged to heartily rip the piss, and rightly so!

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  4. Geez, I'm glad I dont drink....I dont know that I could quit smoking, diet and exercise AND stop drinking all at once. Meh

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  5. The only thing that sticks with me from my drunken escapades is the morning after unpleasantness. Not drinking is much easier.

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  6. I try not to say, "I know what you mean," but I can here. We had 3 failed IUIs last year and I was doing the same thing...eating perfectly, little to no alcohol, acupuncture...when it didn't work the month before my 30th I went off everything - prenatals, fertility drugs, etc and back on alcohol, eating badly, etc. I felt I deserved a break. Now I am back to trying to do better, but not worrying about the alcohol, although I monitor it. I'm with ya sister, you should look at this that I posted a couple weeks back...http://nikusroad.blogspot.com/2010/06/am-i-pregnant-dont-get-your-hopes-up.html. Good luck, I'm prayin' for ya!

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  7. I can honestely say the BEST thing about moving up to adoption is not having to worry what cycle day it is to fiugre out if I can have a drink! Hope that 'getting back to it' is smooth!

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  8. Ahhh so you let your hair down and had a wee drink, well, a blow out! - sometimes it just has to be done !!
    Im not a big drinker - i despise the hangover -so stopping drinking wasnt a big thing for me.

    Looking forward to reading your IVF journey babe, and best of luck for September.
    If i were to give you any advice (and im no expert)I would say, dont change too much before your cycle, diet, exercise etc, sometimes its too much for ur body to handle as well as an ivf cycle.
    Rest and chill as much as your life allows.
    Brazil Nuts are supposed to aid implantation, i managed a couple a day before i was admitted to hospital. Im not sure if that helped, or the 16 days in hospital resting that helped, or it was just my time, but my cycle worked 1st time. It can happen babe !! xx xx

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  9. The hangovers never seem worth it, do they? That was one major upside when I gave up the booze earlier this year. No hangovers.

    Best of luck with your upcoming IVF, and hopefully you will then be staying off the demon drink for a long stretch.

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  10. Booze is good. Hangovers isn't. Oy.

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  11. You're allowed some debauchery ... just not enough to make you regret it. LFCA says your birthday is coming up, too ... hope you're going to celebrate in style.

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  12. Don't beat yourself up too much about the odd lapse - noone can be virtuous all the time. Better by far to live, laugh and have the occasional big blow out than to exist in a state of constant self-denial.

    Hope you're now fully recovered and back down the gym!

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  13. Isn't it awful the way you have to KEEP exercising and being virtuous, all the bloody time? It just goes on and on. SO very boring.
    Sure life wouldn't be worth living if you didn't fall off the wagon once in a while.

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  14. What irritates me about the virtuousness we have to adopt is that there are people out there who can full down drunk nearly every night of week, whilst smoking 20 a day and living on McD's for breakfast, lunch and dinner and who still get knocked up in the nightclub car park. However all our virtuousity gets us nowhere!

    Anyway, I tell myself I only have to go back on the rails from the month before a treatment is due to start and the acupuncture starts 3 months beforehand. I'm due to cycle in Sept too, so the acupuncture has started but I'm eating too much trash, having the odd glass of vino and not going to the gym often enough yet - next month, I promise.....

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  15. I really wish you WOULD regale us with a tale of your drunken shenanigans. Something tells me it would be good:)

    I also think it's good to fall off that wagon once in awhile. I might knock myself off this weekend. And sometimes it's especially good to do it all the way. Because it makes it that much easier to return to a life of virtue.

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