Thursday, 24 December 2009

They Think Its All Over ...

... It is now.

Barnsley is playing at home. Translation: my period has started.

Just like last time when I had a trigger shot, I haven't had to wait the full fourteen days for a result because after a mere twelve my period has gatecrashed the party, and left blood everywhere. (Twelve days of Christmas, my arse).

So that is it.

I've had the last of the three free Intrauterine Inseminations (try saying that after one to many sherries). I go back to the doctor early February (unless I can squeeze into a cancelled appointment in January) to find out what happens next.

I suspect they will suggest IVF, I imagine I will get one NHS-funded shot, I have no idea what the waiting list is like, I never really thought it would come to this. I am not sure if I even want IVF (but that is a whole other post).

Bring on a boozy Christmas with hot baths and soft cheeses.

Not exactly what I'd planned but I'm still determined to enjoy myself. And I hope you do too.

Merry Christmas!!



  1. F*CK.

    I'm so sorry missus. F*cking hell!

    At least it has had the decency to come before Christmas so you can have lots of champagne. xxxx

  2. Oh my honey, I'm so very sorry; I really am. My fingers were crossed tight! (Stupid fucking useless fingers.) It's hard news at a hard time, sweetheart, and I do wish it wasn't so.

    I'd be very surprised if the next suggestion from them wasn't IVF (for what it's worth, I personally found the IUI protocols harder to deal with than the IVFs, as I had more injectables on the IUIs) but perhaps the thing to do might be to shelve the whole 'next step' thought process for the next few days and enjoy the pate and champagne; sufficient the evil to the day thereof, and all that. Tonight, we sing! Or... whatever takes your fancy. Either way, I think getting down a few bottles can't hurt in the pursuit of the merriest possible Christmas.


  3. Damn and blast. I'm so sorry to hear this. I had everything tightly crossed for you.
    Is there an upside? possibly and I guess it evolves around the booze and brie but I hope that your xmas is as pleasent as can be expected. ((sigh)) indeed.


  4. Arse arse arse arse ARSE. I am so sorry. Clearly my crossed fingers were also completely bloody useless. I was so hoping that you wouldn't be allowed near the bubbly and brie.

    Hugs, and I hope your Christmas is jolly and boozy and cuddly and wonderful, and I shan't cross my fingers for a cancelled appointment in January because I feel I might jinx you, but I am hoping very much everything goes smoothly and luckily.


    Merry Christmas, my dear. I will drink a toast to you tomorrow morning.

  5. *sigh* *grumble* *growl* I'm so fucking sorry.

  6. :( I do hope you enjoy yourself in spite of the crap. I got 3 IUI's out of my insurance as well and none resulted in a take home baby either.

    12 days isn't a bad luteal phase, but the end result is suckiness.

    Lots of love for Christmas.

  7. Shit, I'm sorry.

    All the best to the two of ye for Christmas, and I hope ye hit the new year fresh and ready for more.

  8. Blurgh. I'm genuinely sorry. I hope you can squeeze some goodness out of the festivities, booze, soft cheeses, coffee and all. I'm rooting for you in the new year, girl. {{hug}}

  9. Ah honey, I'm so sorry. I have been really crap for answering or leaving blog comments, but I have been thinking of you in the past few days. I was really hoping this would be it for you two.

    Have a decadently boozy Christmas, as we plan to do, and hopefully this new year and new decade will bring you joy.

  10. I'm so sorry. I know that these become so much harder when you are coming to the end of one treatment and have to decide what to move on to next...

    Make this Christmas very merry.

  11. I've had 3 IUIs as well and learned there is a middle step, it's an IUI with more drugs! We were told it added about $600 to our $700 IUI deal. So maybe ask the doc about that before jumping to the $8,500 IVF. I'm sorry this didn't work for you, I feel your pain!

    Enjoy your champagne and Merry Christmas!

  12. I'm so sorry.

    Have a Merry, Boozy Christmas.

  13. EFFF. I am so, so sorry this just effing sucks.

    Enjoy the booze and soft cheeses this Christmas and New Year.

  14. that really sucks. But you're right, at least you can enjoy the booze and cheese :) I'm sitting here at the beginning of my 2ww and will have to abstain from all the fun just hoping I'm preggo. Odds are I am not. That just sucks. I'm so sorry! But you are right - there are lots of things to celebrate and be happy about! Enjoy yourself!!! xxx

  15. Oh no! Not fecking Barnsley. So disappointing. Really sorry - I can't believe it. UGH.


  16. My only advice is go get drunk. Life's a bastard.

    Have one on me...

  17. So sorry.
    2009 is undoubtedly a bastard of a year. Roll on 2010.

    The "good feeling" I had for you (and us) turned to shit here on Wednesday as well....

  18. I'm sorry. This really sucks. I even had my fingers crossed for you! I sincerely hope 2010 brings you everything you've ever wanted. ((hugs))

  19. Totally sucks. I agree with the others...2010 can't come soon enough. So sorry...

  20. I've been following your blog for some time now & really hoped you'd be celebrating this christmas - sorry it wasn't the best news, hope after a few drinks and all the naughty food you can manage you still enjoy yourselves.

    I'm not quite at the same stage as you but in a similar situation - the hubby and I have been 'actively trying' for years to no avail, got diagnosed with PCSO (finally) after several drs and way too many internals. Just getting over what feels like the worst 3 months ever after having been given a drug to help thin the uterus lining which apparently was 3x thicker than is healthy... gross! 3 months of the worst periods EVER known to women! Anyway, I'm not sure why i feel the need to share all the glorious details but we're now back at the 'you need to prove you're committed to weight loss' stage, although they have now prescribed another drug that may assist (metformin - anyone had experience of this one??) but it means NO alcohol whatsoever this Christmas - Eurgh.

    As if that wasn't enough to burst the party bubble, I am now the ONLY one of my group of friends/family not to have been blessed with a little bundle of joy. The most recent addition to my family was born a week ago and its also my 7 month old niece's first crimbo so as you can imagine, this year the christmas celebrations are like baby central. Its not that I expect the world to stop reproducing or that I dont enjoy seeing the little ones, but being surrounded by cooing relatives who just cant help themselves from asking the obvious questions like 'when are you gonna start a family, times ticking' and stressed out mums offering me their demon offspring and questioning whether I really want kids is enough to make me stay home with a large tin of quality street, getting fatter still and thus reducing my changes of ever concieving!

    Not that I want to dampen everyone's spirits at this time of the year but felt compelled to let you know just how many of us are all in the same boat and to say how incredibly grateful I am that you share your stories whether good, bad or otherwise. Your ability to keep upbeat and humorous is an inspiration to us all i'm sure, but if your post just read 'blub blub sniff sniff' or contained nothing but expletives we'd all be right there with you too!

    Anyway, this has turned into more of an essay than an comment so i'll shut up now.

    If you managed to read all the way to this point without falling asleep then here's hoping the new year will bring you some better luck!

    Happy Christmas!


  21. Fuck! I'm so sorry. Try not to think about the next step until the new year. Enjoy the wine and cheese.

  22. Fuckity fuck. Hope the booze is going down easy.

  23. HELL. Kudos to you for making an effort to enjoy yourself.

  24. Caroline no, I think you are confusing you * key with your u.

    HFF, I took your advice and imbibed a lot yesterday.

    I still managed to have fun, ta Carolyn

    Yeah, turns out crossing fingers doesn’t help Nuts!

    Is that your stomach, Murgdan?

    Barb, the phrase ‘take home baby’ makes me sort of glad that at least it didn’t work at all, rather that than an alternative that results in a non-take home.

    I hope so too Xbox …

    I had all but the coffee, Trinity, (and that’s only because I’ve never liked coffee).

    Thanks Jane, totally fair enough that you’ve had a low profile recently – I hope you managed to enjoy Christmas to some extent.

    Yeah, it does feel like a bit of an end, Megan.

    Cheers Niki, I’m not sure if more drugs would help, but then I’m not sure what would.

    Ta Kelly

    Al, you’re fucking right.

    Och, [cre] that is a pisser.

    Cheers Idgie

    Very, very disappointing Twangy.

    Thanks Batty
    Advice I heeded Mick

    Yeah Wednesday was rubbish wasn’t it Corymbia?

    Thanks for thinking of me manapan

    I just hope 2010 doesn’t disappoint finch

    Thanks so much for your comment Zowie, sounds you’ve had a rough Christmas (no booze and no chance of a pregnancy either, and you have to sit through constant baby talk, ugh). Take care.

    Yeah, Secret D, between now and 2010 I am officially NOT TTC (and not just because I know I won’t ovulate before next year – well maybe just a little bit)

    It is certainly flowing, The Shelia

    Ta Sarah

    Yeah it’s a pisser Serendipity

    Cheers Bunny

  25. I am so so sorry to hear that.
    Before you take the steps of an IVF, can I ask if your husband has had the test which checks the DNA of his sperm? My husband's sperm was fine in terms of the initial test but the further test (which is relatively new research) showed the DNA to be over 25% fragmented which means conception to be v difficult and early miscarriage to be almost inevitable. I write about it in a post here and to be honest, as you'll see I'm not that hot on the science
    It is just that it could be worth eliminating it before you go for an IVF and I really really hope 2010 will be your year.


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