Thursday, 13 August 2009

The Bright Side

I’m not sure how I come across on this blog but, the thing is, I am an optimist.

You want proof? Here is proof.

Go on click over, you'll be bought right back here.

See?

After Monday's IUI I gauged my level of optimism that this would work at about 80%. This flies dramatically in the face of any statistic I have found online, which range from a success rate of 6% to 26%.

But I have done everything I could have done to make this work.

I have been vitamin-enriched, caffine-deprived, alcoholically-abstemious and well and truly pricked, (by which I mean I had a quick acupuncture session on Tuesday for enforced-relaxation purposes, but now I mention it, I did also get a bit of the other).

My optimism is such that I have allowed myself to do things that were previously banned. Calculated the due date (3 May), worked out when I’ll have the twelve week scan and can tell the world at large (October). I've even wondered who should be the next lucky recipient of the 4 leaf clover given to me by my goddaughter (it came to the appointment with me).

Now here I am, four days into the wait and self-preservation is kicking in. My mood is plummeting faster than a suicidal sky-diver, not because I don’t think it will have worked, I still kinda think it might. But my rational side is trying to cushion the blow. My rational side is saying I have to prepare myself for a negative. My rational side is busy beating up that joyful little imp who is tap dancing in my stomach, and causing me to fantasise about names, and who is going to babysit when I go to a wedding on the 12 of June next year.

Mental note: must Google “mood swings and early pregnancy symptoms.”



22 comments:

  1. I'm oddly nervous for you.

    Best best best best of luck.

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  2. Gah! Stupid computer crashed and I wasnt around to wish you luck with the IUI. I'm sorry love.

    Keeping EVERYTHING crossed for a positive outcome.

    Hugs!

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  3. Moodiness is part of the clomid side effects too, and I've been told they can last the whole of the month.

    I feel positive for you as well, and I feel sure that this time is THE time for you.

    I'll know on Sunday or Monday if my cycle worked. Prayers please ... internets and bloggers. Please?

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  4. Wishing you the best of luck, I so hope this is IT for you as well!

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  5. Good luck! I'm hoping hard for you!

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  6. Hah! Great post. I sooooo can relate to those optimistic mood swings. (I pretty much re-calculate the due date of my baby-to-be ever month).

    But, hey, I say forget that rational side and let yourself be wholly optimistic. It really can't hurt, because a BFN is tragic whether or not you've deemed yourself "ready and prepared" for it. So you might as well be positive.

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  7. Ugh. The emotions are awful. Wishing you all the best!

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  8. Optimism is great. I believe in the power of positive thinking!!! I'm trying to get to where you are.

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  9. Just nominated you for a one lovely blog award. And, I hope the optimism continues! I really want to agree with Megan and believe in the power of positive thinking!

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  10. I am exactly the same way... always looking to cushion the blow just in case.
    But I'm a little bit psychic (shaddup - I *am* I tell you) and usually know whether I need to take the niggling worry seriously and stock the house with industrial-sized chocolate bars and DVDs of my favourite movies OR whether I can just make sure there's a few tissues left in the box just in case.
    So I'll think positive thoughts for you and cross every finger that smiley faces prevail.

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  11. I swear every time I was in the TWW I cycled back and forth between being sure it had worked to being sure it hadn't at least 20 times per day. Hope the wait is as painless as possible and that you get that fantastic news you so deserve.

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  12. you crack me up :) There's nothing wrong with optimism - I am hoping like hell that I get to add Womb for Two to my blogroll in a couple of weeks. Sending all the postive vibes I have in me your way, I hope the next few days don't drag for you.

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  13. Apparently optimism and imagining yourself with a live baby are essential when ttc.

    I think it may take a little more than that but that is what I read in a ttc book (about a year and a half ago).

    I really hope that the IUI and optimism and well wishes makes this your month (oh, and I suppose the husband had something to do with it too).

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  14. Statistics don't always have the full story! You're not the only one who has jumped to a "due date" calendar and starting thinking into the future. As long as you don't start planning out schools and colleges just yet... :)

    Good luck!

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  15. That hormotional ride is a tricky one. Hoping all the best for you.

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  16. Cheers Xbox, I need all the luck I can get (optimism diminishing)

    Keep your own legs uncrossed Sarah

    Ta HFF

    My thoughts are with you Anon (although it would help if I had a name to focus on - is this Diary of a Miracle?)

    Me too A Few Good Sperm said...

    Cheers Kelly (non alcoholic cheers of course)

    Good way of putting it WannabeMommy

    Thank you Barb

    What about positive thinking tinged with cynicism Megan?

    Oh thanks! Gracie

    I have no psychic ability Corymbia, but I will ensure there is champagne in the house on Monday. No to celebrate with but because if I am going to drown my sorrows I'll do it in style.

    Definitely, lots of ups and downs, battynurse

    in a couple of weeks? Serendipity, I wouldn't know that early!

    Secret D, the husband is outdoing himself with negativity to try and keep me grounded.

    But waiting lists for schools can be so long Rambler...

    Thanks Lost in Space

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  17. That google will find you my blog, back in the day. Hell, it'll find every intefertile's blog, you know?

    Best of luck.

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  18. just caught up to see that you are on your way already with the iui done. Awsome. Did it hurt?

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  19. I've got everything crossed. xx

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  20. You mean I'm not unique, Penny?!

    It was painful but not on a scale of the IUI, and eminently bearable, PiB

    Sounds painful Cazza

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  21. not that you need any more "assvice..." but I really think eating pineapple to aid in implantation is worth it!

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